BAR Discussions

BAR Discussions – plane travel

Raj: Mutli-plane travel has left me confused. And no, I am not complaining about the heavy travel. I have been travelling through different planes of reality and looks like this current plane’s physical position is Earth. I managed to get a first hand feel of what we call these planes as – dream, imaginary, surreal, metaphysical and do you know, I went with your kid to platform 9 and three quarters and we waved good bye to Harry and Hermione.
Bob: Oh, shut up and what have you been smoking – cocaine?? But, I missed talking to you and your thoughts amuse me.
Raj: No Bob. I am serious. I had to exist in different planes and the truth is different planes are all manifestations of permutations and combinations of possibilities at any given point in time.
Bob: There you go, please explain with an example.
Raj: Simple, I came to office by bus today. I was considering driving down in my car. In another plane, I have reached office earlier by car.
Bob: That way, millions and trillions of planes can exist. In one plane or the other, lions must be sitting in Alipore Zoo watching men in cages or at a stadium watching men perform in a circus, eh! Chicken and turkeys, in some other plane would grill and have humans as kababs on Thanksgetting Day, is it?
Raj: Possible, yes, but I didn’t see those planes, fortunately. Bob, remember, mostly it is men who watch men and women in circuses along with animals. Anyway, I traversed very few planes and let me tell you more.
1. I saw Ghajini with my wife last weekend. In another plane, I saw that Ghajini’s shooting had to be stopped. There was a particular scene where Aamir Khan, the Muslim boy was talking to Asin, a Hindu Malayalee girl. The scene was being shot on top of a bus that had no roof. In fact, when Aamir was proposing to Asin – all of a sudden, some people barged into the bus and police had to intervene and disperse the protestors. The producer had to stop further shooting after %$#@! threats that were issued to him. One of the options he was considering was to replace Asin with Jiah Khan and Jiah Khan with Soha Ali Khan.
I read something similar had happened in Mangalore where a MLA’s Hindu daughter and a Muslim boy were dragged out of a public bus and the poor boy was beaten up. Now I don’t know which plane is what but all these planes co-exist but do not seem to overlap. Maybe we are pushing the boundaries now, Bob.
Also, in one of the planes, Muthalik confirmed to P Chidambaram that the Sri Ram Sene is being grossly misunderstood. His group will go after anything that is associated with amnesia – Amnesia Pub or anterograde amnesia as was seen in Ghajini. The Sena is a focused group, they hate individuals claiming, “I am Sena” – hence they oppose Amnesia, a cunning rearrangement of the letters, I am Sena. The Sene believes in team work as an integral part of Indian culture.
2. In cricket, England was all out for 51 against West Indies and Australia lost 2 matches to New Zealand in a row. I am thoroughly confused and do not know which plane is it!!
Bob: Raazh. I already told you I don’t follow Indian sports like cricket. I only follow World Sports like American Football and baseball. Did you see Steelers win the Super Bowl XLIII?
Raj: Yeah, that’s World Cup for you. Wow, what a global perspective, Bob! You live in 2 planes too, one is American and the other, where America is the world and rest of the world doesn’t exist! Ha ha, welcome to the confused plane syndrome, Bob 🙂
Also, you were telling me about an alternative theory that Valentine’s day is celebrated because Saint Valentine, who upon rejection by his mistress was so heartbroken that he took a knife to his chest and sent her his still-beating heart as a token of his undying love for her.
In another plane, Sri Ram Sene is confused because they now believe after all; St. Valentine was inspired by Lord Hanuman’s actions. He had torn open his heart to show a high resolution picture of Ram and Sita. So, Valentines Day could now become integral part of Indian culture and we could call Valentine Navami or name it Dil Se Din – that would make AR Rehman happy too. It is meant to be a political masterstroke because it keeps all votebanks – Musims, Hindus and Christians happy. How secular, Dil Se Din.
Bob: Point taken, Madman. Now, is the deck ready – we have to review and present to the CIO?
Raj: Yes, Bob.
Mental note: In an alternate plane, you not only made the deck, I made you rework on it through the whole of last weekend. And in the morning, you went to Starbucks and got coffee for me, saaley!


4 thoughts on “BAR Discussions – plane travel

  1. u took me to a higher plane altogether !! gr8 !!regarding the American habit of referring to local games as World events, we have something similar in S Asia , with cricket — many Indians think or claim that cricket is an international game !! i have had polite arguments with Chennai auto drivers on this . in S.Asia, the Sports World is divided into cricket, and Nothing Else. Only very few Indians follow Olympics, Soccer WC, and only middle and upper class follow gramnd slam.

    1. thanks KR. The habit of globalizing local games seems extremely pronounced here, though. Of course, I agree with your inputs.

  2. Good one! Love the usage of anagrams, as always!

    Ranga: Thanks as always for the kind words. Anagrams are big time pass and psst psst … there are some tools available on the net for creativity generation 😉

  3. Great as usual. You can always make us laugh. Though, I might be wrong but, Asin is a Christian…

    Ranga: Thanks, G. Yes, you are correct, Asin Thottumkal is a Mallu Christian girl. Wikipedia shows that she was born in Roman Catholic, Syrian Christian family in Kochi , Kerala 🙂

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