I obviously make no effort to conceal my love for mass entertainers: especially Hindi / Tamil movies that keep using tried and tested formulae since the origin of cinema. I also love to look at some serious issues through the eyes of a mass entertainment film‘s possible plot.
For example, let us take some tried and tested combinations of rich boy, poor girl or even a poor boy and rich girl marriage scene. While this marriage scene is getting shot let us sprinkle some dowry masala powder just when the ‘I now pronounce you husband and wife’ part is about to happen.
The priest is all set to order the groom to tie the thaali or mangalsutra, but the groom’s dad, Dushtappa has other plans.
The bride’s middle class, honest, no-bribe taking, God and society fearing government servant father, Dharmappa and his log kya kahengey wife, Rajo ki Ma are asked to meet Dushtappa before the wedding can go on any further. Dushtappa rattles off his demands. For a moment, the girl’s father is hoping that the demand is only restricted to welcoming guests with Pan Parag paan masala, but no, the demand turns out to be an impractical request list: few crores of rupees along with assets including a penthouse in Manhattan with a houseboat in Alleppey and a non-negotiable chopper parked on top of Mukesh Ambani’s new house.
The world begins to spin; it’s almost as if some Divine force, most probably Dharti Ma had decided that it was the most opportune moment to prove the Geography lessons learnt in school by giving a demo. Dharmappa could see the earth rotating and revolving at the same time (Of course these would have to be edited well and the Graphics team from SillyKhan Media would work on it). The mom could see the spins too for a couple of seconds before fainting.
Dharmappa, the one with poor negotiating skills tries his best when he first places his turban and then throws himself at the villain’s feet. Has that had any effect on the demands in any movie ever? No, but that’s how these scenes are always meant to be! Throw in some generous dose of tears, show indifferent bad pop lighting a pipe with a Zippo lighter and demand the music director to go ballistic with such tragic music in the background that even Cacophonix the Bard would be proud. The scene is perfect. The entire crew is moved to tears.
More details on the scene:
Dushtappa gives victim a quick lecture and makes him see the future clearly. The dialogue is as follows:
a. What is important for you? (Note: dialogue edited from WTF is important to you?)
This wedding or calling it off? Daughter’s happiness or money?
Do you realise the side effects: Nobody will marry your daughter. The whole samaaj will spit on you.
b. And what is the whole naatak on the Money part: You can beg, borrow or steal.
Remember the characters who stole for their wife or child’s operation? Pran in Don, Sandman in Spiderman 3, and ABC in XYZ …. the list is endless.
Dharmappa begins to evaluate options available to him.
“Cut!” screams the director. “That’s enough shooting for the day”.
At night, the crew discuss about the scene.
The CWG is also similar, Kalmadi / the country is all set to organize an event that started with a budget which has no relation to actual money spent. But the choice to hold the event or not did exist.
Ghar ka izzat or desh ka izzat protection: is it really the only thing that is important? Can’t nations make mistakes? Sponsorships are not happening, just like Dharmappa’s relatives who refuse to help him. Kalmadi and Co. can of course eat into various funds and taxpayer’s money and ensure that the event does happen. Just like Simplefather who can rob banks or kidnap the neighbouring village’s rich bureaucrat’s child and get a few crores as ransom.
But SimpleFather has to clearly understand the context. Will his daughter live happily ever after with this groom?
The crew and the story writer unanimously recommend kicking Dushtappa and calling the wedding off … That is what will make the audience whistle and clap. That would satisfy men and women of all ages and backgrounds.
And I would agree.
What about CWG? We should have taken inspiration from Dharmappa and stopped this CWG. Period …
Note: This post was written long ago and although the context as of today may not be fully relevant from CWG perspective, I am going ahead and posting anyways.