We must be forward looking in life. I confess that this line has certainly helped me to follow the Forgive and Forget philosophy. Which is good … well, Usually!
But I am not God to forgive and forget everything so easily. Even if I was, in some way, Agneepath reinforced that Revenge is good. K B Uma said something like revenge is best when served cold. [Note to Tamilian readers: KB stands for Kill Bill and not K Balachander!]
So, it was clear that Revenge had to be delicious and the more you waited, it would get better and better whenever you did get to taste it. Like a 12, then 15, then 18 or 20 year old mouthwatering scotch whiskey. Also, double note that even if Amitabh was indeed wrong as Vijay Chauhan, both Big B AND Duggu Roshan could never be wrong at the same time, err … at different times but in the same role.
Indeed, I am unable to forgive and forget some specific incidents or people. There is this one such person who recently died and therefore, I am sharing this secret with you, Dear Blog. People I know who know her are all speaking nice things about her and have completely forgotten or ignored the truth that she was Evil. That’s what people do, no? When somebody does die; they only remember the good things about the person who is no more.
But not me … She is, I mean was, about 35 years older than me, but I had plotted my revenge so clearly in my mind when I was a 13 year old student. The plan had been simple. I had ganged up with my close friend and we would wait till we finished our entire schooling which was only 3 more years to go.
Then, I would go to school as an alumnus, dressed in cool casuals, and summon her out of her lair. The other students and teachers would come rushing out from the classrooms upon hearing the seriousness of my voice. After all, I was going to liberate them from the clutches of this Evil ruler. The soldiers, err … security guards would want to push me away. I could have overpowered them like a Mithun da fight sequence. [Note: Mithun cunningly brought into the thought process to provide not only the Hindi masala hero but also for the Bong touch due to the school’s Kolkata location]. But that, Blog, would have been too cinematic! The villain had to be bigger, like a sinister Kancha Cheena or Lord Voldemort. So in my mind, the best way to boost her image and show her maniacal ego, was that she would indeed come out …. And when she did step out in the open, she would see her citizens eagerly waiting to watch the duel between the challenger alumnus, Rangarajan and her. The soldiers would race to pounce at me but she would let out a bark and scream at everybody to stay still and quiet. Hissing like a snake and letting out strange sounds she would proudly show off the wooden rulers, her trusted and loyal weapons from Camlin. She would, [just like the beautiful Sharapova, who releases a strange form of sound energy seconds before a serve or a return] let out a war cry and armed with those wooden rulers, would come rushing at me. She would think that she could repeat the treatment she had meted out to so many of my schoolmates. She had ruthlessly beaten those kids, because they always did something that they weren’t supposed to do. They were kids, the bad kids who maybe deserved some beating, but not me in class 7 and that too in front of the Kashmiri girl with apple red lips and the good looking senior for whom I had planned to write a letter after 5 years if I got an admission to IIT! Dear Blog, my eyes felt hot every time I planned and imagined the scene in front of my eyes. Fire would bellow from my eyes; in the process, threatening to char my eye lashes. And then, as the Evil One advanced, in one swift movement, like a Jet Li, I would snatch the rulers and throw them away. Heavy metal Guitar sound in the background… The good looking senior school students of the opposite sex would whistle and 1 or 2 would faint at the bravery displayed, when I would give one tight slap across the Evil One’s face. Ms. ThEO [ThEO stands for The Evil One] would, in slow motion, look at me stunned and then I would say, “Remember that day, 5 years ago when you slapped me?? Did you hear the sound of the slap, then??
This slap!!, today!!!, that you just felt and Heard!!, is the echo of the sound of that same slap . . . ”
Thunderous applause … drums, more guitar or violin sound in the background.
After one tighter slap to account for the interest on top of the principal slap to be given to the school principal, I would walk away without even turning back at the hostages. The duty alone had to be respected. People had to be protected, and freed forever. Their love could be accepted later but in the climax, the hero just walks away while the villain is left at the mercy of the people, the democracy!
Remember the ‘Thappad ki goonj’ dialogue from Karma that made Dr. Dang and Anupam Kher famous? That had always been the inspiration here for my Dialogue to the Princy, Dear. Blog!
The plan never materialized despite meticulous planning and continuous preparation along multiple dimensions that included mental, spiritual, physical, geographical and even historical angles. For example, the spiritual preparation included requesting Lord Hanuman many times to give me enough strength to be able to carry this plan out.
As soon as I left school, and joined another, I got busy.
Then I got busier and the ‘being busy’ index only kept going up with post graduation, job and more work.
Every now and then that little fellow who talks to me from inside my head kept telling me that my revenge was not so far away. However, I didn’t care or maybe I did take the scotch and revenge analogy too seriously … and went wrong on the duration of the wait.
Recently, I opened my Facebook page and saw that the 73 year old lady died a few days back. Students and teachers spoke great things about her. One of my classmates, won something big for a whitepaper in the US, on a complex topic around homosexuality but he dedicated it to the Lady, saying she had sown the seeds of confidence and knowledge and he was the resultant tree. The whitepaper was probably the fruit. Another one spoke about his values and went on to write a small stirring speech … How could they be so nice and forgiving, I wondered? Then, the teachers also said nice things, yes, the same teachers who were the poor victims of ThEO! That was when I thought that maybe, just maybe, she was not so evil, after all. Nooo …… I was becoming weak and the pain behind the slap had dissolved through time. Come on, don’t fall for this, I told myself!
That 13 yr old boy in me instinctively reached to the right cheek and re-lived the pain … it still felt warm from the slap’s impact, but I must now release the burden of failing to exact revenge. Thappad ki goonj will reverberate in my next janam, but for this life, let us just conclude that I shall have to deal with one less sin when I die …
RIP Ms. Ela Mukherjea …