bollywood · Movie review

Chennai Express – Ek Avur review, woh mera hoti!

With an infinite array of opinions on Chennai Express, I am obviously too late to review it. But that isn’t my job either. So, why did I give myself this difficult assignment to write a 1200 word review of the movie? Justu lykk that! becaas I yam verri tempted to time paassu saar.

One Naarth Indian baai abouttu 40 ears old has ye verri old old thaatha (nawnaa ji) who jusht misses becoming a wun hundred ear old exactly lykku Sachin against Pakistan in a wun day matchu. But the forty ear old baai has verri friendly friendsu who want to spend naati days with girlsu and boozu filled nights at Gova. Baai praamises Gova plan is aan. Though thaatha has jushtu gaan to gaad, and so verri sad peepul are all around, but Gova plan is aan says the baai (add quivering laafter like only saa rukku kaan can lof). But Paati (nawnee ji ) outsources impaartant task to take thaatha’s one half of ashes and throw in Rameshwaram to mix with holy waaters. But selfish baai decides to cheat paatti and go to Gova but who can fight Gaad’s wishes? Baai boards Chennai Express to throw dust into paati’s eyesu.

Now, I have deja vu and think paap caarn has some hallucinatory powder in it.

Loffing at myself becaas jushtu like DDLJ, Saa Rukku wuns again pullsu wunother heroine into train. I am loffing verri confused becaas about wun month ago, I saw Deefikaa was pulled into train in same Mumbai station platform running by Ranbir Kapoor in filim called Yey Deewani Jawawni Hain … Illay Po .. Poda Podi or sumthing lykku that. Along with Deepikha, Saa Rukku allsow pulls in big rowdy fellows wun ofter wunother. Thus starts the verri funny journey of Saa Rukku and Deefikha.

This is first Saa Rukku Khaan fillim in Tamizh. Aiyyo … not dubbed like Dil Se but made in pakka Tamizh saar, full rongta khadi hoti for all Tamilians who also like indi filims. The ladki is gar se baag jaati and to be fair to the lady, she is verri nice. Soopper Hindi speeaking istyleu, I say! Fullu nose cuttu to Saa Rukku. In Tamizh fillim, forget Thalaiva (no, not the latest Vijay padam but the wun and wunly king Rajini), even smoller heroes do naat get overtaken by heroines like this. But twenty firstu century yeppa, fullu equality and all peepul tolking although atrocities are aan, but imagine movie starts with heroine nameu and then wunly Saa Rukku’s name-u itself comes on screen. Whistle podunga da! Then girl is getting down whereu platform starts when train chain pulled becaas Deepikha’s appa is Daan. Sathyaraj is good and jushtu lykku before I have more déjà vu when he says, yennammaa kannu the way he says in many pictures and adwerteesmentals? (I am tickled by now and loffing like mad in theatre … so much so that my dawter is yembarrased and askes me to be silent … she is becoming bigg girl, I say. I won’t buy you paak kaarn, I playfully admonish her and continue admiring Saa Rukku and Meenalochani)

Deepikhaa runs away becaas of a bigg maanster size villain called Thangowbali, wunother villain who makes Khaan lukku like a joker … hoo hoo haa! Verri funny, I wuns again say! Some antaakshari playing keepsu happening becaas the eero and eeroine use songs to tawk in indi language that the gundu gundaas don’t undershtand. Saa rukku is introduced as deepikha’s baai frenddu and they again run away. In between old Super Star movie Muthu’s scene is allsow copied shamelessly. #$@%!

1234 saang appens to cool me down and fullu theatre loffing and clapping. Little baais and girls are allsow giggling like little baais and girls, I swear!! Dappankuthu saang in indi fillim, saary this was tamizh padam, I keep forgotting in the entire time.

Ab baag ke ek avur gaav mein jaati eero eeroine …  in bitween 2 or 3 more verri funnee tamil fillim side of side of side kaamedians also coming and life of pi, dump charades all happening. Magical feeling, I tell you. Even an old Mallu joke around yendha joli becomes no no I am baai not Angelina jolie … I am all in splits, I say!!! I am thinging I need Doctor Prof. Calculus for doing to me Integration by Parts operationu … really the scenes was soo soo funni. Baai pushes bigg villain jushtu lykku Small Thalaiva Vijay pushes Prakash Raj in bad dirtee waater in super hit fillim Gilli. Same scene or déjà vu I am fully blown now on waater and salt paap kaarn, I am thinging. Copy paste takes new meaning and height of no maanams … matlab copy paste karti tho uski besharmi ki bhi hadh hoti naa?

About enviraanment, Wifey watching on right and amma on left, tears flowing down loffing so mucchu … jokes o jokesu from Deepikha pulling Saa Rukku’s leg so much.

I am thinging she wonts him to become as toll as her before the filim ends, but he doesn’t till the end of the fillim. So sad. More chaos, and then it becomes little serious from Kashmir to Kanyakumari! Deepikha does a 60% Jothika of Chandramukhi without saying Lakhalakhalakha fast fast but these indi filim watching peepul will not know about the copy paste, no? Smaartu boy, this Rowith Settiar or something lykku that who ees the directioner of this filim. Lovvu happens buttu it is only verbal, no kissu, no hug, no kemistry, no biology, no fisiks … nuthhing. She again pulls leg saying you must be 50 to SRK … and you believe her, I say!! Poor old eero … noo, naat wunly eero, even aadiens does not wont him to become older and stay young. As I said earlier, aal is about Gaad’s wishes, right aa? Then final climaaks fighttu is naat bad at all, Baai takes bucket and hits villains head, bucket flies off and handle stays in his hand. I wos reminded of Kieron Pollard trying to hittu six off Ashwin and ball hitting bat but handle staying in Pollard’s hand but bat flying off to allmosht hit mid aaf fielder! Now, I am seriously blaming paap kaarn but eating some more of it.

Aal eej well when it all ends well. Now comes rating for fillim.

Story, screenplay, direcshun:      Minus Wun Star

Saa Rukku Khaan:                           3.5 stars (2.5 stars for this movie and another 1 for all the earlier movies.  we love you! err … i dont though                                                                  becaas wife is suchh yey bigg fan)

Sathyaraj and that Bigg villain and all others:       2.5 stars

Saang and Daans:                          3 stars

Rowith Settiar:                                Minus 2 stars … keep making these type of movies, encourages me to write such naansense … hee hee!

Deefikaa Padukone:                      4 stars [awesome! you rocked]

Total:                                                  9 out of 30 and thus, rounding off, 1.5 out of 5 stars

Now, I am reaching house and bahut bahut kush hoti. The brainsu I faartunately left behind can now be put back into my head …!! But hey, pop corn seriously made me forget the best part of the movie. Strategy to make film run in South India is incomplete without Thaliavaru. Becaas of last saang as a tribute to Rajinikanth, I give another 1 staar and make it 2.5 stars to end this brainless review, a little more brainy than the Namma Singara Sennai Express though. Don’t under-estimate the power of the common man, Rohit Shetty bhai … but maybe the movie might just run because of the lead pair and comedy.

And that is about 1200 words for the review! Ready Steady Po Da!!

Warning: Whenever I shall see silly movies, I shall return to review and send the link to Deefika (for fun) and Rowith Settiar on Twitter to celebrate shamelessness 🙂

P.S: As Saa Rukku has biggu heart, he agreed to promote OUATIMD … Imran Kaan will dance behind Saa Rukku and Deefika in a new song called, Thangoballi Poyaar ka dushmon haai haai haai … meanwhile you ensaai

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10 thoughts on “Chennai Express – Ek Avur review, woh mera hoti!

  1. Ranga supera Expressu pannitey butu aana Chennai Expressu?!?!
    Ranga: it has already crossed 100 cr biz. Really encouraged by such statistics ; tombs thanks for your comment

  2. semma riviuuuu 🙂

    Ranga: Nanri madam for leaving your comment. glad you liked it … the fact that people like this utter naansense is verri nice and i am encouraged to write a post on this liking pattern also … will revert on that soon, thanks a lot 🙂

  3. kalakkitta mama !!!! dilwale dulhaniya chennai express mein le jaayenge….i dont know I am saying….just got suddenly inspired like you did…

    Ranga: dhaank you Magesa … 🙂 nalla irikku idea

  4. Yennala mudiyalai… LOL… ROFL… kadhaya kettu mercel ayiten… 😉

    Ranga: Goks … dhaank you dhaank you, would have been better to see you actually laughing but will take your comment and imagine your hearty loffing 🙂 encouraged is what i will say for doling out more reviews and posts 🙂 🙂

      1. Thanks… I do not get much time to write, though I’d really wish to. Sir, the sense of humor in your writings is unparalleled. Keep up this tempo. If you would allow, I would like to take permission to place links to your blog on mine.

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